There is a short video on YouTube that we really like around here. It speaks about failure and the importance of trying. I try to have my people watch it once a year as a reminder that failure is a part of life. After the carefree season of summer, it takes a bit to get back into the demands of school life for us. Don’t get me wrong, my kids have been reading, playing their instruments, and doing math pages for the past 8 weeks, but not for 7 hours a day. I am a BIG believer in the power of setting a goal and making a plan to tackle it. I also, do not think that the goals that we make have to be lofty. It’s up to us to help our kids break down their larger goals into small, more attainable goals in order to have success!
So, at the beginning of the school year, sometimes the week before it starts, sometimes within the first couple of weeks we watch this YouTube video. Then we discuss the importance of having a vision and continuing to pursue that vision even if we fail! Who do we want to be? What do we hope to have learned by the end of the school year or by Christmas break? Who will we positively impact in our lives? We sit down as a family with our journals open and write down things we hope to accomplish during the year.
Some examples of goals that my kids set are: Practice the piano M-F before school, memorize a new scripture once a month, make 2 new friends this year. Invite a new friend over for a playdate. Get straight As. Do one secret something for someone at school each day or each week. Complete homework as soon as I get home from school. Play with a new person at least once a week at recess. Workout with Mom at least once a week. Choose to walk away from an argument and wait 10 minutes before going back to speak about it. Write a letter or Thank You note to someone once a week to brighten their day.
The possibilities are endless. Help them make 3 goals or more. They do not need to be big. We then make reminders for ourselves. Usually a word, or a drawing that we stick next to their bed so that they may hold themselves accountable.
Now, a big part of this practice is making a goal to focus on myself. I am raising good humans, but know that ultimately I am not a finished product!! All of us are affected by good examples in our lives and it’s important that I do my best to be one in my own home. I like to have a measurable goal that I can share with my kids so that they can see that I am trying to improve myself too. Goals in general can feel personal, but some of the goals that I have made and have shared with my kids are being on time!!! Man, with 6 kids that is no small feat and something that I constantly have to remind myself that I need to make room for all of them to be ready to go! Also, exercising by a certain time everyday. I tend to exercise whenever I can fit it in, but feel so much better when it is done sooner than later. Have at least 1 night a week in which I lay in bed with my kids before they go to sleep. This idea is worth a whole other post, but for now I’ll just say that there is magic in taking time to just lay with your little person (or not so little person) before bed and letting them decompress with you. Some of my favorite memories are things that they have said to me in the dark in their bedroom when they felt comfortable to open up and share their fears or their triumphs. Make a goal that will help you become the person you hope your kids will become. Be present. Be available. Their time with us is so short, make it count.
Then I usually bring it up once a week at dinner. We discuss how our goals are going. If their goals are too personal to share at the table they don’t have to go into specifics. Sharing our successes helps keep motivation high and also helps us reevaluate if goals need to be adjusted. Sometimes we forget, but I find if I have made my own goal to work on, I am more likely to remind them of theirs.
Now, this practice can totally be done for New Year’s, however, I think there is power in teaching our kids (and reminding ourselves) that goal-making is not once-a-year thing. A regular Tuesday is just as great for making a goal. We have definitely spoken more about goals and persistence as we’ve watched the Olympics this last week!!! What great examples of goal-making and achieving!!
So, join us!! This week my family will be making goals and sticking to them, or scrapping them and readjusting! The first step is always the hardest, so let’s dive in together!
Kayleen
